


i think i love you (but i don't like you)

by georgiehensley



Series: Kinktober 2019 [15]
Category: Brave New World (TV 2020)
Genre: Anger, Angst, Barebacking, Biting, Canon Compliant, Denial of Feelings, Hair-pulling, Introspection, Love/Hate, M/M, Possibly Unrequited Love, Rough Sex, Slight Pain Kink
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-16
Updated: 2020-10-16
Packaged: 2021-03-08 17:48:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 381
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27050692
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/georgiehensley/pseuds/georgiehensley
Summary: When around Bernard, sometimes John just wants to punch him in his stupid, handsome face.Or, the one where John and Bernard fuck, and John gets a little too in his head about it (and him).
Relationships: John the Savage/Bernard Marx
Series: Kinktober 2019 [15]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1478774
Comments: 5
Kudos: 29





	i think i love you (but i don't like you)

**Author's Note:**

> me: *has a million and one responsibilities*
> 
> me: *chooses to write another kinktober fill instead for a fandom/pairing no one cares about*
> 
> yeah. it took me a while, but i finally got an idea for this kinktober prompt. it's supposed to be "hair-pulling", but of course i went way past that into introspection territory. whoops. also, i've been meaning to write for this fandom for a while. i've loved the book since i first read it in high school and the peacock series adaptation absolutely slaps. so naturally i had to write a thing for john, my favorite boy, and his complicated feelings towards bernard. enjoy!
> 
> title from the push baby (rixton) song of the same name.

When around Bernard, sometimes John just wants to punch him in his stupid, handsome face. Mess up his perfectly styled hair. Ruin his ridiculously straight, prim posture.

But this? This, he can settle for, pulling on that dark, styled hair of his as he fucks him into the mattress. Of course he’s into it, the bastard, moaning like a whore as John tugs at his scalp, the amount of product in his hair making John’s hand slip every now and then. 

It’s stupid, the way John’s shacked up with this guy. The way he’s fallen victim to the practices of this city: taking soma, sleeping around, going to parties. 

He hates it. 

But mostly, he hates the guy lying beneath him, without whom, he would have never gotten involved in this mess. The dick who just had to get shot while on a trip to the Savagelands, only to trigger John’s sympathetic side when he found him bleeding out in an abandoned hotel room. 

John groans, trying to wrest the memories away as he thrusts into Bernard harder, feeling the man writhe beneath him, his stupidly long legs wrapping  _ oh so perfectly _ around John’s waist.

John should have never gotten involved. He should have spit at them, those New Londoners, leave Bernard to die and return home to his mom. Who would still be alive. Who would never have  _ died _ .

John practically growls, feeling the rage building up inside him, not quite sure how to get it out of his system. He settles for ducking his head down, digging his teeth into the soft skin of Bernard’s neck, biting down hard. Hates the way he feels a thrill run down his spine at the way Bernard whines, so compliant beneath him.

He should have known the guy would have a thing for pain. 

John tries to clear his head as he feels his orgasm start to build, knowing that he’s getting close. But he gets flashes of images in his head, like the past couple days put on replay, in fast-forward. Everything blurs together except Bernard. His dumb, handsome face. Ridiculously charming accent. Stupidly perfect hair.

John’s heart pangs. He leans down, kisses Bernard hard, and comes inside him.

He hates him. He hates him.

He wishes those words were true. 


End file.
